Today has been a tough one...not a lot of sleep last night, a very rainy, yucky day, and Jim has been gone for over 36 hours...all this makes for a very grouchy mommy!!! My patience has been tested today that's for sure. Today I was sending a fax for Jim...it was 25 pages and our fax machine is super slow!! Maddox was helping me by "catching the paper" as it went through the machine. I had gotten about halfway through the transmission when Maddox hit CANCEL!!!! It was incredibly frustrating...I had to start over. But when I think I'm about to lose my mind, my sweet baby boys remind me why life is so darn good....while the boys were playing in the bath tonight, Maddox leaned over and said very quietly to Cooper while looking at him square in the eyes..."Cooper Dooper, I LOVE YOU!" Thank you, Jesus. Thank you for constantly showing me how good I've got it!! I have two healthy, happy children who are so loved....and they love their mom & dad and each other!!!! When I put Maddox to bed tonight (super early, I must admit) we snuggled close while we read his favorite Curious George book. When we were finished with the story we said his prayers. Usually, we just hold hands and I say the prayer and he follows along with me (especially when we start the "blessing of our family"). Tonight, he must have known that I needed a little extra love...right before we started praying, he climbed in my lap and put his head on my shoulder. Such a small little thing, but it meant so much to me. I gave him an extra squeeze and lots of kisses before I told him goodnight. It's these moments that I know that I am definitely living my dream. I have found that in my sleepless, foggy brain I sometimes forget how incredibly blessed I am...but I'm lucky, I've got two wonderful constant reminders.
Tonight I put both boys in the bath tub together...that is something that I have been looking forward to since I found out that Cooper was on his way!! It was precious to see my two precious boys "playing" together and having such a fun time TOGETHER!! I LOVED having a sister close in age. We had many moments of fighting like cats and dogs...or sisters, but all the squabbles are a distant memory to me these days. I talk to Emily almost daily...sometimes more than once if I'm lucky! I often call her even if I don't have anything exciting to talk about, I just call to chat...to see how she's doing. I feel extremely close to her and so blessed to have her in my life. Now, if only I could convince CJ to look for a Wesley job in the N. GA area, it would be perfect!!! I hope that Maddox and Cooper will grow up to be close and to love and value each other. To look at them today, I feel like they will...Maddox loves to entertain Cooper and Cooper is always up for a good laugh! I told Jim recently that I pictured them in 20 years hosting a party...Maddox was the one in the center of the crowd saying, "Hey, watch this!" and Cooper was laughing and having a good time and making sure that all the guests were happy. They seem to be so different already but a perfect match!! These two little guys are so special to me in a way that I cannot even describe with words. I love them so deeply and so fiercely that it hurts. I had this overwhelming fear when I was pregnant with Cooper that I would not be able to love him as much as I loved Maddox. I mean, let's face it, Maddox is pretty awesome and Cooper had a lot to live up to!! My heart surprised me though, I had been told that my love would not divide, but grow...and oh my goodnes, it definitely did!! I cannot believe I wasted so much time stressing and worrying about such a silly thing...but I think for me it was a "gotta see it to believe it" event for me. So, as I think of my little roly poly Cooper squealing and splashing in his tub seat and Maddox showing him all the tub toys and telling me, "Mommy, Cooper is so happy!" I can go to bed with a smile on my face and love in my heart. Sweet dreams, my precious boys...Mommy loves you very much!!! Cooper, I'm sure we'll meet again before the sun comes up!!
Maddox is really one of the funniest people I know...he's forever cracking me up with his witty comments or his interpretation of life.
A few weeks ago I heard him playing in the family room...he had his cowboy hat and his "mundy" (some change). He was leaning over the sofa with his cowboy hat on the floor beside him. He dropped his change into his hat and then said, "thank you, Pastor, thank you!". I thought I would cry from laughing. I have never heard anyone else say that, where in the world does he come up with this stuff! A few days later, he had some change again (he really likes to have some money in his pocket) and he asked me in a very serious voice, "Mommy, are you the Pastor?" I told him yes, and he said, "Oh good, thank you" and handed me his money!!
So, I love to read other people's blogs...I think it's so fun to keep up with people and it feels a bit like mommy therapy!! Jennifer Reynolds' blog has inspired me to give this a shot!! I am terrible at writing things down...I own a baby book for each of my boys, however, they are not filled out...ok, they are new (bought them before Cooper was born) and I haven't written ONE THING in them!!! I know I'm not going to remember all the funny stuff they do forever...maybe this will help! We'll see how it goes!!!!!!